So, I had my last EMDR session on Monday. [post about that here] I decided that I don't think that EMDR is right for me. It didn't really help much. Possibly because I have a very short attention span. And a bad memory. I don't know. All I know is that I need to find someone new. I have so many options, and it's really overwhelming.
My first option is to see a counselor at school. I am going to pursue this first. I only saw one of the school counselors for a couple weeks, but she was very helpful. The woman that I saw before isn't at the school anymore. I'm kind of upset about this. That means telling my life story to another fucking person. The other problem is I'm not sure if the school does long term treatment. I want to be able to keep the same person all school year. Also, they don't really specialize in what I need, so that's another issue.
My second option is to find an outside therapist. This is what I'll do if my school denies long term treatment. I hate trying to find a therapist. My first therapist was amazing, and I compare everyone to her. I want a female doctor. I want them to have a doctorate in the field. I want them to have a background with trauma / sexual abuse. I need them to accept my insurance. It's so much to ask for. A lot of the therapists around the area don't have a doctorate and most of them are social workers who also do counseling. I need more than that. I hop my school can give me a referral to a good doctor.
The next option is that I might go back on medication. This means finding a psychiatrist. I'm not sure if it's exacltly what I want yet, but it's something I might have to do. I have'nt hurt myseld since I've been off my meds [10 months soon!] but maybe it was just those types or that combination that wasn't working for me. I hated my previous psychiatrist, which is why I haven't gone back to see one. Again, I'm hoping that my school can give me a referral.
My other option is acupuncture and/or herbal remedies. My EMDR therapist suggested it to me, since I didn't like medication before. I looked into it, and it seems like it might be something good for me. However, it usually isn't covered by insurance and I'm poor. Also, most of the accupunturists in Boston aren't open to fit my schedule. I have class until 6 or 7 at night. So it's would be extremely hard to fit it into my schedule ontop of doing CBT therapy.
This has really been bothering me all day. I'm sure that my school will be able to help, because they can't just say no to helping me and leave me with no where to go. I just need to not stress out about it. I can't do anything until I'm back in the city anyways. Wish me luck!
If you are looking for a therapist try this site or this site. And good luck to you too!
Good luck. I know what you mean - it's important to be able to keep the same therapist for more than a few months. But you have lots of options and lots of backup plans, I'm sure you'll find someone suitable.
ReplyDeleteI'm kinda interested in EMDR after your first post about it. I think it'd be a great first step for me to deal with my trauma, since I refuse to talk about it. So, thank you for telling me about it!
xx
Yes, EMDR is very interesting. It did help me with things like issues with my family, but I was too terrified to talk about my abuse, so we never got there. If you do try it, I wish you luck!
DeleteHmm I've been doing CBT for bout 3 month and I've been on medication for bout three weeks I guess (cipralex but only half of this drops cause I am pretty skinny). CBT works for me quite good although I am not much of a talker. I think it's because my therapist is quite good. I found it exhausting sometimes all this nonsense talking ;-) and sometimes I feel like I need a drink afterwards.. :-D Maybe CBT isn't that bad for you. I went through pretty much the same just more beating.. like to a point where I had to go to hospital..
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